Friendships vs. Cliques in the Blogging World

blogging friendship cliques

Having a group of friends is a perfectly natural thing. You had them at school. You had them at uni. You've probably got them at work. This is entirely normal - you might gravitate towards certain people because you share a hobby, or perhaps you simply have a similar outlook on live that draws you closer. In a community as diverse as the one created through blogging, it makes sense that you'll come across people with whom you have interests in common. You may even come across several people that you share a real connection with and this shared connection may develop into a friendship group, complete with a group chat on Whatsapp. And all of this is good right? The Internet is a great place to make friends.

But what if it's not? What happens when friends turn into cliques? I asked on Twitter whether my followers felt that cliques were a big problem in the blogging community and the majority of people answered YES.

Today, I thought I'd delve a little deeper into this issue. Are we bloggers really cliquey?

cliques blogging community
Mesh Bodysuit: Boohoo
Meek Grande Watch: Adexe

A clique is defined as a group of people who actively exclude anyone from outside of their friendship circle. The word clique is associated with bitchiness and spiteful behaviour. The members of a clique thrive on making others feel small and unwelcome. Essentially, a clique is a friendship group gone TOXIC. Let's hear some examples of that, shall we?


Well. This is awkward. When I asked people on Twitter for examples of cliquey behaviour that they'd experienced, this turned up very few responses, despite 74% of people viewing cliques as a serious problem. I also asked several people privately and although a few very isolated incidents of clique-y behaviour were reported, the vast majority of people couldn't think of a single example.

clique blogging community blogger

It seems to me that what we think about cliques is basically a series of big fat assumptions.

"I bet all Ellen, Steph and Ashleigh do in their group chat is bitch about others!" 

People seem to think that every group of bloggers in a Whatsapp chat uses that chat exclusively to bitch about others. I'm not saying that this categorically does not occur, because I'm sure that in some cases it does, but should we really be assuming that EVERY SINGLE PERSON in a group chat actively uses that to spread rumours and talk shit? Pffft. I don't think so. I don't know about your group chats, but in mine, we discuss everything from boy dramas and outfit advice to Olaf the snowman and ideas for our new Instagram themes. There's very little time left to bitch about people. Frankly, we've got better stuff to do.

"Poppy tags Rachel, Tamsin and Lucy in every #FF, they won't want to talk to me!"

People also seem to think that just because the same group of friends tag each other in #FF every damn week that these people won't talk to anyone else. And that just isn't the case. I don't think I've ever come across a blogger who exclusively talks to people within their friendship group. I am a member of several friendship groups and I've never been made to feel bad or unwelcome because I have friends who aren't within these groups. 

friendship blogging clique

All this talk about cliques really brings me down. What's really happening when we put the label of "clique" onto EVERY SINGLE FRIEND GROUP is that we're judging people for the simple human action of having friends. I'm not saying that the blogging world doesn't have a single clique, it most likely does. But we need to remember that not every friendship group is a clique. On that note, I'm going to conclude this post with a question, Carrie Bradshaw style. 

When we make assumptions about "cliques", are WE the real bitches?

cliques friends blogging community

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this post. If you have experienced cliquey behaviour, do let me know in the comments below - let's have a discussion! Please also show your appreciation for Hayley and her ace photography skills in this post!

Until next time,

A x

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