Embarrassing Question Q&A

It's time to dish the dirt. And nope, before you jump to conclusions, I won't be spreading evil rumours or gossiping away about anybody else - the only embarrassing secrets that I'll be sharing are my own. If you've been needing a massively TMI Q&A in your life, I'm delivering the goods with today's post. Ready for things to get awkward? Here's everything you've ever wanted to know about me but have been too afraid to ask.

When was the last time you let someone take the blame for something you did?

Not that long ago actually! My boyfriend and I were clearing out his fridge because there was some seriously gross stuff in there. A lemon that was so old it was BLACK, for example. Ick. However, I was a bit too over-zealous when throwing things away as I decided to chuck out a bottle of salad dressing that was a few weeks out of date. That evening, my boyfriend's housemate comes home, makes himself a salad, and lo and behold, the dressing he wanted to use was missing. Oops. My boyfriend covered for me and told his pissed off housemate that he'd chucked the dressing out, bless him. 

Have you ever shoplifted?

It probably doesn't count as shoplifting but I helped to rob a casino once. I was part of a crack team of experts alongside Danny Ocean and Rusty Ryan ... oh no wait ... maybe I just watched Oceans Eleven. Never mind. Jokes aside, the only time I've stolen anything was a fridge magnet from a shop when I was a kid. Naughty naughty, I know. Somehow I don't think the criminal life is for me.

Abbey, wearing a pink puffer jacket, leans on a graffiti wall, looking down
Pink Padded Jacket: Next

What are you most self conscious about?

Definitely the fact that my eyes wrinkle up when I smile. I always look like I have eye bags for days, even when I've had a really good run of sleep. My eyes are something that I used to absolutely hate about myself and I am now a bit embarrassed about the lengths I used to go to in order to edit them out of any selfies that I took. As I've gotten older, I think I've just accepted that my eye bags are on my face, and there ain't nothing I can do about it. Still, I do lack confidence because of them from time to time - they do make me feel like a bit of an ugly duckling. 

Have you ever peed in the swimming pool?

What child hasn't?! I can definitely say that I haven't done it in my adult life though, because ewwww. I remember going on a family holiday to Gran Canaria when I was about 5 or 6 and meeting a little boy who used to stand on the rope bridge overhanging the swimming pool, pull down his trunks, and piss straight into the pool. I thought it was hilarious at the time but now I'm rather grossed out that I swam in that water!

What is the most awkward sexual encounter you've ever had?

Unfortunately, this one is easy to answer! It probably isn't as bad as being caught in the act by your parents or something similar (thankfully that has never happened to me - YET!) but still, it was quite awkward. My boyfriend and I don't usually have music playing when we're in the bedroom but the one time we did, we just put his Spotify on shuffle. And guess what song came on halfway through? Oh yes, Kings of Leon's Sex on Fire. We both stopped, just looked at each other, and burst out laughing. It was a little awkward (we switched the music off after that!) but very funny!

Abbey, leaning against a graffiti wall, smiles at the camera, hands in pockets
Grey Knit Top: Boohoo (similar)

Who is your most embarrassing celebrity crush?

I admitted this secret crush to my lovely friends Hels and Kate after a few wines and they definitely didn't agree with me, but I actually find Gordon Ramsey in his younger days rather dishy. The sweary side isn't quite so attractive but I saw clips of him running a cooking show for kids in which he was really nice and encouraging towards them, so I think that makes up for it. Maybe I just like a man who can cook?

Have you ever lied about loving a present and then re-gifted or sold it?

I think it's rude to be ungrateful for a gift or tell the person who got it for you that you don't like it, so I have most definitely lied about liking a present! I've also re-gifted things in the past - for example, I'm quite picky about what kind of skincare / bath products I use so if I get gifted something that I won't make use of, I will give it to someone else. This might seem bad but I think of it this way: it's better that they get used than just sitting in my cupboard gathering dust for ages!

What is something that you really ought to know but don't?

I am absolutely appalling at maths. It's never something that has come naturally to me, I just don't think my brain is wired to understand numbers! I really ought to know my times tables way better than I do, but it still takes me a little while to sit and think about a multiplication sum to work it out. But hey, I don't pay a ridiculous amount of money for a smartphone to not use the calculator when I'm in a pinch, right?

A close up of Abbey's pink thick-soled lace up trainers, leaning against a graffiti wall
Suedette Chunky Lace Up Trainers: Everything £5*
Use my discount code ABBEY5 on Everything £5 for money off your order!

What is the most inappropriate dream you've ever had?

AHA. Well. At sixth form, I had one class with a guy who I thought was a bit of alright. *nudge nudge, wink wink* He was one of those people who was quite hot although I could never put my finger on why. You know the type, don't you? One night, completely out of the blue, I had the most random inappropriate dream about him. It was the first "sexy" dream I'd ever had and I felt so awkward the next day, I couldn't look this guy in the eye in class! I made the mistake of telling my best friend about this dream who obviously took the piss about it for AGES - I still don't think I've lived it down!  

What is the worst wardrobe malfunction that you've ever experienced?

I can't remember where I was heading off to, or why I was so dressed up, but one evening a few years ago, I was driving somewhere and I needed to stop for petrol. I was wearing a pink skater skirt that was quite short, and I didn't realise when I got out of the car that the hem was tucked into the waistband, leaving my whole bum on display. I filled up with petrol as normal and was walking to the kiosk to pay when a woman came running over from the other side of the petrol pump court and told me what had happened. I'm so glad she did, because god knows how long it would have taken me to realise for myself!

Have you ever been in a fight?

Like pretty much everyone else on the planet, I've had plenty of fights with my siblings in my time, but few actual fisticuff incidents or shouting matches beyond that. One time, however, I did scream blue murder at a girl I went to sixth form with, who had been spreading ugly rumours about me and badmouthing my friends. We both ended up crying after I shouted at her and sort of made up (although it didn't stop her bitching about me *eyeroll*). Apart from that, the only other fight that springs to mind was the time I smacked a boy who had cheated on me across the face - twice. That felt good.

Glitter Denim Jeans: Coast

What are your answers to these embarrassing questions? Pick one and reveal in the comments! Go on, I dare you!

Until next time,

A x

*The shoes featured in this post were gifted to me by Everything £5 but I was under no obligation to share them on my blog